Rarely, if ever, do I find a nugget of wisdom when watching The Bachelor. You don’t watch the reality dating show to hear truisms on love. There are about 20 girls who are all madly in love with one man and have no problem watching him waltz off on a date with your roommate, probably kiss her, and then take you out the next day. I’ve always questioned the “reality” of these girls’ feelings. Yet one contestant uttered something a few weeks back concerning her relationship with this year’s man. She said that she was in love with him and that when she was with him, she felt like herself.
Despite the “reality” of the show, what this woman said really struck a chord with me because it’s true. When you are with the right person and you are in love with that person, you will feel like you. It’s hard to know what that feels like until you experience it. I remember thinking that love was that crazy roller coaster of emotions where you didn’t know which way was up for you. I thought that never knowing what was coming next or how I was going to feel was normal. I thought that love was not being comfortable with yourself. As silly as it might sound, I thought that love changed you.
Now I know that love does change you; only it changes you to make you more fully yourself. When you are truly in the right kind of love, you will feel like you times a thousand. Your dreams become reality and you find yourself setting and reaching goals. I used to battle with myself about what I wanted and where my relationship was going. They felt like two separate things but they’re not when it’s right. Instead of worrying about your partner and what’s coming next, anything is possible, in a good way. It’s a magical feeling to feel like you and to be in love with someone at the same time. It’s the knowledge that you don’t have to second guess how you act or what you want because it all feels natural.
It’s such a hard feeling to describe that I feel like I’m never going to do an adequate job doing so. But when it happens, you’ll know. You won’t be afraid anymore for the next step. You will feel like you but even awesome-er.